True Colours

Tuesday, 11 February 2014

Storytelling 1 | Page 13 of my Childhood

Childhood memories are part of our life, be it happy or sad, great or terrible. These memories are something that happened in the past of our life that no one could ever have a chance to change or experience them again. However, without childhood memories, we would never be ourselves today.

You might be the luckiest kids in the world, had great times during your childhood and you always wish to travel back time. Unfortunately, I was not one of these kids. I hope I could forget about my childhood. If there is a delete button to erase mankind memories, please allow me to delete all of my childhood memories.

Time is going to tick at 1 a.m. I am sitting at the graves. Wind blows across my face, pulling down my tears. Half of the page of which I am staring at gets wet when the tears dropped on the page. It was the page 13 of my diary. This diary is a tiny room of my childhood life.

Page 13:

I heard some noise outside my room. Someone has just come back. It was the guy that I have to call him ‘dad’ after dad passed away years ago. God has brought him somewhere when I was six. I have always dreamt that he would come back in our life one day. I believe about miracles. I would wait…

I keep wondering why mom has allowed this guy to stay in our home and I was given no choice to accept him as my new ‘dad’. This guy is nobody but a great drinker and drunker. I have no idea about what he is working as and why we are living with him.

The noise is getting louder as I heard him shouting on mom. Subsequently, I heard the whimpering of mom. It tears out my heart though I have been used the same scene and feelings since he moved in. I try to peep from the back of the door in my room.

He is beating recklessly on mom and this was not the first time. Out of sudden, he uses the liquor bottle that he brought from nowhere to hit mom. Blood spread across the floor. Mom is trying to struggle and protect her head with the hands. I could not bear to see that anymore.

I could not remember where did I found a knife, probably somewhere from the kitchen. And I could not remember anything further. The last scene that I saw was that the fake dad lying down on the floor, blood dripping from his stomach until I could not see the greyish color of the cemented floor. I heard the crying of mom, until it was overtaken by the crowing of the rooster in the morning.

That was the page 13 of my diary. When the day turns into history, we would never have any chance to change even a second of it. Mom was sentenced for 12 years of prisoning. She passed away after 6 years living in the prison. This is the 13th year since the page 13 was written. Mom would have been released from the prison today. However, I would only be able to visit her at the graves.

No one actually knows about the tragedy happened in the page 13. As time goes by, the memories fade. I would let go these memories and move on…

Here goes the song about the hearty protection from parents. Without the love of parents, we would not be complete. I am thankful that mom has accompanied me so far and sacrificed herself to allow me for living a second life. Though the guilt that lies deep beneath my heart would never fade away…

Friday, 7 February 2014

Photographer 3 | Eikoh Hosoe

Eikoh Hosoe mentioned that, photography to him, is not merely about going out and take photograph but it is an alternative to create something. He is not a documentary kind of photographer but rather known for his experimental and philosophical style of works. “Photography can be simultaneously both a record and a mirror or window of self-expression…” said House.

Born 1933 in Yamagata, Hosoe graduated from Tokyo College of Photography in 1951. Hosoe’s work often has characteristic of high contrast, graphical, black and white, portraying mysterious atmosphere that is sensual but disturbing. Some of the subjects that Hosoe has explored include death, erotic obsession and irrationality.

One of the interesting series of Hosoe’s works that I love is titled ‘Ordeal by Roses’ with Yukio Mishima as a model . Mishima is one of the most important Japanese authors of the 20^th century. He is also a poet, actor and film director. Hosoe was commissioned to photograph Mishima for the cover of his book and Mishima has offered himself as a ‘subject matter’ to Hosoe for photographing.

I like the first photograph that Hosoe made on Mishima. In this photograph, Mishima was wrapped entire body in a hose at his garden. The reason Hosoe did so was for the purpose of destructing a myth. He wanted to destroy the preconceived image of Mishima and create a new Mishima.

Ordeal by Roses

Another series by Hosoe was named ‘Kamaitachi’ that depicts the story of a supernatural being that haunted the Japanese countryside of Hosoe’s childhood. These photographs are in black and white, mysterious, dream-like, with the performance of Hijikata, the founder of dance performance art called Butoh. In this series, Hijikata is seen as a wandering ghost confronting farmers and children.

Kamaitachi

Hosoe is also known for his masterful studies in nudes and human body forms. The series 'Man and Woman' was released in 1960, depicting the rivalry between two genders. In 1971, he released another series called 'Embrace', capturing the dialogue between men and women.

Embrace

Thursday, 6 February 2014

Photographer 2 | Philippe Halsman

Halsman Self-portrait

Halsman was an American portrait photographer, started from fashion magazines such as Vogue in his 24 and gained popularity for images that were sharp focused and closed-up.

Halsman’s first success was realized when the cosmetic firm Elizabeth Arden used his image of model Constance Ford in an advertising campaign for “Victory Red” lipstick.

Constance Ford

Besides working on photographs for advertisement, Halsman’s portraits of celebrities and politicians also often featured on the covers and pages of popular magazines during his time, such as Look, Esquire, Paris Match, especially Life.

One of the series of Halsman’s artworks that I love is the series in collaboration with Surrealist artist, Salvador Dali. He has incorporated elements of humourous, playful and imaginative. He mentioned that photography could be dead serious or great fun, either capturing the elusive truth or one’s imagination.

Dali 1941

Dali 1946

Dali 1948

Dali 1951

Dali 1954

Dali 1964

Dali 1970

One of the stunning photographs, Dali Atomicus, was produced after 28 attempts. I think Halsman actually enjoyed collaborating with Dali, as we could see that they had been working together for 37 years. This is what I think about photography, it is a game that we can play with. Treat it as a game, and you will enjoy the process. Furthermore, we could include any unusual idea in the frames or make anyone as a hero in the portraits.

Dali Atomicus

Monday, 13 January 2014

Photographer 1 | Shen Wei

Shen Wei, a Shanghai born fine art photographer, who is currently based in New York City, known for his intimate portraits of himself and others. His photography work has also covered some exploration of contemporary China. His name was first introduced to me by my course lecturer cum fine art photographer, Ms. Ho.

Nudity in photography is not new. It has been the source of inspirations since the first day of photography being introduced. However, the publication and exhibition of these photographs may still be controversial. I am open to nude photography as I see it as an idea to depict some kind of freedom in mind in a visual aspect. Varied angles, poses and action could define different emotion and stories.

Almost Naked – One of Wei’s photography series, consists of portraits exploring identity and sexuality in America. It was motivated by his passion to understand the complexity of emotion, desire, introspection and instinct. In this series, he sought to explore the relation between nudity in mind and physical nudity. In my opinion, some people tend to feel more relaxed and comfortable without wearing any clothes. The emotion flows naturally when people are relaxed.

James, 2007

Hyramd, 2005

Collin and Erica, 2007

Wei has another self-portrait project – I Miss You Already, capturing the process of self-reflection and self-discovery. These photographs include his introspection, rebellion, memory, fantasy, anxiety, seduction and emptiness. I like the way he put himself into the frames as a journey to understand and discover his inner self.